Monday, February 13, 2012

Tomorrow's news today: You can only read it here!


COLUMN
Why wait? Here are the big headlines you can expect in 2004.
"Aging superstar sings the legal blues as City Council chimes in"
At her Jan. 14 trial, Diana Ross is found guilty of driving under the influence and ordered to do community service. She sings her Motown classic "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" on Sentinel Peak as the Tucson City Council repaints the "A" white in rhythm.
" 'Mad cow' disease reaches Tucson"
Restaurateur Bob McMahon closes his signature steak emporium and opens a vegetarian restaurant Downtown. He does so against the advice of his friend Mayor Bob Walkup who whispers to McMahon that Downtown is dead.
"Tucson homeboy catchesPotomac fever but keeps his barrio style"
A retooled Congressman Ral Grijalva, who eschewed neckties as a Pima County supervisor, makes the cover of GQ magazine dressed in a charcoal-gray Armani suit - with an open collar. In the interview, Grijalva notes that Cesar Chavez never wore a tie, either.
" 'No Child Left Behind' takes the fun out of school; top Tucson educator seeks bigger challenge"
Tucson Unified School District Superintendent Stan Paz resigns to become director of the new Kino Community Psychiatric Hospital. The county Board of Supervisors says Paz's managerial experience and human-relations skills won him the job.
"Tucson City Council declares itself competent, takes over Downtown redevelopment"
The City Council, frustrated by the lack of progress on the Rio Nuevo redevelopment project, changes the name to Rio Viejo. The council resurrects old ideas to revitalize the revitalization project and orders the construction of a Sonoran Sea Aquarium.
"Former UA football coach still looms loud"
University of Arizona football coach Mike Stoops buys the Foothills home of predecessor John Mackovic but flees after some chilling nights. Stoops and his family are terrified by the sounds of ghostly tantrums and furniture being hurled against walls.
"UA Athletic Director Jim Livengood bans student transfers"
UA basketball coach Lute Olson guides his squad to another Final Four appearance but loses the championship to a Georgia Tech team led by an unstoppable Will Bynum, who left the Wildcats for lack of playing time.
"Alternative transportation champion makes U-turn"
Light-rail advocate Steve Farley, in a major change of position, launches a citizens initiative to build a six-lane loop from Southeast Tucson to the Northwest Side and an east-west freeway connecting Interstate 10 with the Rincon foothills. His group, Citizens Advocate for California in Arizona, is funded by car dealers and land developers and hires Arizona Daily Star columnist Bonnie Henry as publicist.
"Beleaguered Bush returns to the mountaintop for cash and inspiration"
Crippled by a cash-flow problem for his re-election campaign, President Bush returns to Mount Lemmon and holds a fund-raiser, where he quotes the "I Have a Dream" speech by the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. Bush fails to reach his goal of $100 billion because Democratic presidential contenders lock arms and block the Catalina Highway.
"Arizona Legislature promises new work schedule"
State legislative leaders pledge to remain in session 365 days during 2004 to avoid a costly and fruitless special session, like last year's. Gov. Janet Napolitano disbands the 90-member body and declares martial law.

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